Real-life take on superheroes

Today, I saw a clip of Robot Chicken, and it had a very interesting premise. It deals with Superman learning that his parents are alive, and that Krypton is okay. Apparently, Jor-El

(his father) was dealing with custody issues, and sent baby Kal-El to earth in order to spite Superman’s mother. Now, that sounds very comical and grim. Which leads me to think: why doesn’t DC produce animated Elsewords stories (the answer to Marvel’s “WHAT IF” TV show), and come up with wacky scenarios that are based on real-life embarrassing situations?

DC’s Elsewords produced alternate versions of established superheroes. From Batman dealing with “Jack the Reaper”, in the late 1880s, to Superman being raised in the ideology of the Soviet Union. These stores examine the different scenarios of how things might have turned out, had there been a slight deviation of events. Of course, the stories could be explored into the real-life, comical scenarios.

In his 1969 article, "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex", Larry Niven explained how difficult it would be for Superman to be intimate with a human woman, and the problems of trying to conceive a child. Well...DC should create a full-scale animated production of this interesting story-line. It is one of the things that linger in the minds of long-term fans, and it is good to discuss those intricate questions. Why stop there? There are many funny scenarios that people have thought of.

ELSEWORLDS Batman tales to explore:

1. Batman’s costume is so hot, during the summer, that he only works the rest of the seasons.

2. Batman is served with a class-action lawsuit for denying the civil-rights of criminals.

3. Bruce Wayne is suffering from hypertension, due to lack of sleep.

4. Bruce Wayne is seeing a psychiatrist, and has to take pills.

5. Bruce Wayne loses half his fortune in the divorce from Selena Kyle.

ELSEWORLDS Superman tales to explore:

1. Superman is cheating on Lois Lane with Wonder Woman.

2. Superman gets high on Crack Kryptonite.

3. Superman has a general problem with hygiene, including bad breath, bad body odor, and smelly underwear.

4. Clark Kent has crooked teeth because braces will not work on him.

5. Clark Kent gets constantly fired for being absent from his job.

Let’s stop there. We know that superheroes are fictitious, and are there in order to entertain us. Of course, we could only imagine how things would be like if they existed in real life. That is why it would be interesting to see these stories being developed, and have a laugh at their expense.

Hey, DC! Make this happen!